I'm Through

I have this feeling I am going to revert to my previous reserved manner. Trying to be social and "have a life" isn't working out for me. Who was I trying to fool anyway?

So for now, school and my family will be numero uno priorities, myself coming in second, then film, and then other stuff. The only friends that ever mattered to me moved away, the only friends who I'd consider doing anything for. The people I know today are just classmates and nothing more and I shouldn't expect too much out of them.

I don't really need any excess baggage or drama and frankly, that's just what teenage girls love to carry along with them- no matter how much they say they don't need it. So I'm done. I give up.

Tomorrow's Monday. Ew.

She Falls Asleep - McFly

beautiful song <3

"But what were the chances I'd ever find someone to really love me now? And maybe loving her back would be the hardest part of all."

I began reading the novel Beastly by Alex Flinn today. So far, it's been very absorbing, but I'm taking a quick break from reading to update my blog. 

Reading sort of made me realize something rather interesting... Now I'm not the most superficial girl in the world, but to a certain extent, I'm not even going to lie, looks do play a significant role. I just wonder if I'd ever look past someone's looks. I'd like to believe looks don't matter at all to me, but I don't want to go lying to myself. I think that looks do play an important role, even though they totally aren't everything.

But like I said, I'm not entirely superficial and I'm a strong believe that Beauty is in the eyes of the Beholder. It was really just a chord that was struck within me upon reading the book. 

Anyway, carry on. If you're a romantic or a fan of fairytales, check out Beastly. It's a pretty great story. And I think they're making a movie out of it too, starring Alex Pettyfer. If you don't know who he is, Google him and thank me later.

-Tiffany

Returning!

I haven't logged on here in the longest time! For awhile, I was over at Tumblr, but it's full of spam and nonsense and honestly, I just wanna blog about how I feel and I don't feel like Tumblr is the right environment for that. So, I've decided to revive this blog back from the dead. Like it or not, here I am and I am here to stay (although I doubt anyone reads this blog). I'll probably still use Tumblr, but not for my more personal thoughts... Probably just to goof off, because frankly, that's all I feel Tumblr is good for.

Not A Hero

Weren't you the one who told me, I was wasting, wasting my time?
I guess I should apologize for speaking, speaking my mind
But I cannot be silence
I cannot be, cannot be controlled
You might think you've got a hold on me
But you're just that easily fooled

So you can wipe that smug look off your face
Save it for another rainy day
Keep your feet on the ground for a change
You're not a hero
You think you've got me right down to a tee
Must be why you're suffocating me
Must be all the lies that everyone believes
But you're not a hero

I'm not the only one who sees right through you, through your disguise
It's time you woke up and realized, you're wasting, wasting your time
And I will not be silenced
I will not be, will not be ignored
You think you have just told on me
But they're not so easily fooled

So you can wipe that smug look off your face
Save it for another rainy day
Keep your feet on the ground for a change
You're not a hero
You think you've got me right down to a tee
Must be why you're suffocating me
Must be all the lies that nobody believes
But you're not a hero
You're not a hero

No, you're not a hero to me
You think you could make me
The villian you make me out to be
But you're just no hero
You're no hero

So you can wipe that smug look off your face
Save it for another rainy day
Keep your feet on the ground for a change
You're not a hero
You think you've got me right down to a tee
Must be why you're suffocating me
Must be all the lies that nobody believes
But you're not a hero

Waiting for something to happen...

Saw 'My Sister's Keeper' today. I loved it. Never in my life have I cried so much during a movie and laughed at the same time. It's a beautiful film, I recommend it.

So far, this summer is alright. I mean, I wanted to get a job, but for some reason, I don't see that happening, so I guess I'll work on my community service hours for school instead. I guess I'll try to make life happen, too. Last summer was a waste and I have no intentions of letting this one flop too. I've got my heart set on a David Cook concert. Let's see if that's happening. Ugh, my life is so boring and uneventful. I really need to do something about it. Let's see if I can.

On a more personal note, I'm really frustrated. I'll have one day where I'm super-confident and then three weeks of hating myself. I don't mean to sound emotional or complain or anything. It's something I'm trying to change about myself. And you know, it's not even about my looks or anything. I get to thinking that there's nothing special about myself and that people are bored with me. It hurts. I think that's why I'm so shy and it's so hard for me to make friends. I guess I'm just waiting for someone- anyone- other than my own sister and family to take an interest in me. A genuine interest. I want that BFF-feeling. I want to be more social. I want to like parties and people and going out. I'd LOVE all of that.
When will it be my turn?

Movie Recommendations?

Please let me know. :)

OTH

Mouth: Take a look at yourself in a mirror who do you see looking back?
Haley: Is it the person you want to be?
Dan: Or is there someone else you were meant to be the person you were meant to be but fell short of?
Mia: Is someone telling you you can’t or won’t? Because you can.
Chase: Believe that love is out there.
Nathan: Believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do.
Peyton: Sometimes happiness doesn’t come from money or fame or power. Sometimes happiness comes from good friends and family and the quiet nobility of leading a good life.
Julian: Believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do.
Brooke: Believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do.
Peyton: So take a look in that mirror and remind yourself to be happy because you deserve to be. Believe that.
Lucas: And believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do.